Sex and Relationships

Sex is very important. Why is that, if that isn't too obvious a question? It is because sex is to do with relationships. Now consider how the world's approach to sex is so different from the Biblical approach. On the one hand there is the attempt to divorce sex from relationship. We see this in things like pornography or prostitution or casual sex. Then there is the current headlong rush of western societies to seek to legitimise same sex marriage. Why do they say they are doing this? Because, according to the current world view, two people should be allowed to express their “love” for each other.

What does the Bible say? The biblical view is that sex must be confined for one place and one place only, and that is the marriage between one man and one woman. Why does the Bible place this restriction? It is all to do with relationships. First, it is only in the fully committed relationship of a man and a woman that sex will be beneficial to the relationship, bringing joy, comfort and pleasure.

Now we come to the second reason, and a very important one, in any other relationship sex will be destructive, not constructive, to the relationship. We all (or at least any sane person) know that there are relationships where sex should not play any part at all. Examples are between a parent and a child, between brothers and sisters etc. But there are plenty other examples as well. Sex should not play any part in a relationship between two men or between two women. The gay rights people are very keen on saying that two men or two women have the right to love each other. Yes they do. There should be deep relationships between men and between women, but sex must not come into it, it will only be destructive. Likewise, sex must not come into any relationships between men and women outside marriage. In 1 Timothy 5:2 Paul instructs Timothy to treat younger women like sisters and older women like mothers. Likewise, other men are to be treated like brothers and fathers.

The reason that society's approach to sex is so wrong and must not be supported at all by the church is that it is utterly destructive to relationships of all sorts in society. Conversely, the reason why we should follow God's instructions on sex is that His ways are the only ways that are conducive to good relationships, at all levels.